My name is David, and I am an approvaholic. My whole life, I had a hidden addiction—one I didn’t recognize until it was ripped from me in the most painful way imaginable. My addiction was especially dangerous because it was socially acceptable: I was addicted to approval.
I grew up under the weight of a perfectionistic father, whose ever-shifting expectations made it clear I would never be good enough. That need to prove myself followed me into school, where I thrived academically and athletically, and earned my place as the class clown, always performing. When I gave my life to Jesus in college, I simply redirected the addiction. I exchanged achievement for spiritual leadership and ministry. Eventually, I found myself working among the poor in Southeast Asia—poured out, burned out, and utterly alone.
At my breaking point, I told God I was finished with ministry—unless He renewed my calling. That’s when He whispered something that changed everything:
“Your whole life, you’ve told others they are My beloved. But you haven’t believed it for yourself. Your calling is to know—deeply, personally—that you are My beloved because of Christ alone. And from that place, help others do the same.”
I felt renewed. Purpose returned.
Several years later, during an extremely fruitful season of church planting, I was blindsided by unexpected conflict and painful rejection from people I deeply trusted. Instead of resisting, I collapsed under the weight of it. Depression swallowed me. Nights stretched endlessly, with only an hour of restless sleep despite medication. I begged God to take my life. What once felt like home now felt like exile.
Then COVID hit.
The next few years were a fog of isolation and despair. I screamed at God with rage and language I never thought would leave my mouth. Bitterness grew in me toward the Church. The faces I once cherished became reminders of pain. I lost all desire to live.
And yet, slowly, God began to minister to me—not through sermons or conferences, but in the quiet loyalty of a few friends who reminded me of God’s gracious promises. In the valley of despair, I met my beloved wife—who, in God’s severe mercy, was also in the darkest season of her life. God showed us that even in our brokenness, He was crafting a story of hope and restoration.
Now, seven years after that depression began, I find myself at the beginning of a new journey.
A journey to walk alongside others who’ve been in the valley of rejection, loneliness, and despair. Those who’ve built their identity on performance, success, or applause. Those who’ve wondered if it’s okay to rage at God, to accuse Him like Job did.
I want to be a conduit of God’s shepherding compassion, patient grace, and steadfast love—to missionaries, pastors, and singles who feel forgotten, burned out, or unseen.
Because I’ve learned that being the Beloved isn’t something you earn. It’s something you receive through Christ alone.
We envision a world where those who tirelessly serve others are no longer striving for their worth, but are deeply rooted in their identity as cherished sons and daughters of the Father. A world where ministry leaders lead not from burnout, but from belovedness — refreshed, encouraged, and fully alive in the love of Christ.
At Mission Beloved, we believe that when a person knows they are beloved, everything changes: the way they serve, the way they lead, and the way they walk through both victories and valleys. Our prayer is to see a generation of God’s servants who minister not out of duty, but out of overflow — because they are continually reminded of who they are in Him.
Your support allows us to be that safe place for those who give so much of themselves. Every gift — no matter the size — helps us reach those who are weary and remind them that they are seen, valued, and deeply loved. Would you prayerfully consider partnering with us through a donation?